Aku ingin lari di suatu tempat yang cukup jauh untuk memiliki hati yang aman dan tenang tapi aku masih bisa pergi keluar untuk berjumpa teman.

Aku ingin pergi ke suatu tempat di mana aku bisa bahagia bersama-sama, hanya AKU  dan KAMU. Tidak ada orang di sana untuk menyebarkan gosip sedikit atau kebohongan atau kebencian.

Aku ingin memiliki hari-hari yang nyaman di mana aku dan kamu duduk di sofa menonton filemm-filem lama, bermain permainan, ketawa, tangis, berkelahi dan semua yang membahagiakan hari aku dan kamu.

Mari kita lari. Mari kita menjadi gembira, Aku dan Kamu.

Please Don't Leave When Times Get Hard

 I know we’re gonna have those stupid little arguments about things we see on facebook, or one of us will say something wrong. I know we’re gonna have those times where we miss each other so much and things are gonna get so fucking hard. If we get into an argument or something comes up that tries to tear us apart, seriously don’t leave me. That will prove to me so much that you want this relationship tp work just as much as I do. A girl wants to feel as if you’re both putting effort into getting through this rough spot, and if you don’t leave, even if you keep fighting and are mad for a few days or whatever… if you don’t leave, that’ll prove it to her.

I hate being jealous

Right now, and pretty much every other time I get jealous, I feel weak. I feel vulnerable and fragile. Like anything in the world could upset me, it wouldn’t even matter how good or bad it was. If it made me doubt, it would cause me to be upset even more. I start letting everything get to me. Things I’m long over; things that happened in the past. And the further I fall, the more my brain hurts me. I let myself feel weak. Because I am. I’m weak when it comes to jealousy. it makes me feel insecure and the more memories that are brought back, the more insecure I feel. I guess, I dont know how else to explain myself. for my stupid little tantrums and getting upset so easily. Jealousy is my weakness. It knows how to get me, and it gets me good. it makes me hate myself. It makes me wish things that I dont even want. It just hurts. It gets me exactly where it wants me. Trust me, if I could change this about me, I would. But i guess i’ll just have to learn to live with it. And if you really love me, you will too.

I’m afraid

I’m afraid that our relationship and the love that we currently share right now will soon turn into something similar in the past. I’m afraid that what we have will be like my past relationships that eventually fade away, just like the others. I’m afraid that we’ll soon get pass the infatuation phase and fall into the comfortable stage, where we’ll begin to take each other for granted and cease to make an effort. I’m afraid that someday, you’ll begin to lose interest in me, and the possibility of distance and barriers come between us. I don’t want to lose you, nor do I want this relationship to end up like the rest. I know this is all cliche and I’m sure you’ve heard it before, but everything I say is true. I want us to be different, to share in something neither of us have ever experienced before.

I want us to be infinite.